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The KeysTone Statement

A sports, humor and entertainment blog right in the heart of Pittsburgh (and Pennsylvania).

 An Unofficial List Of The Top 19 Distractions In The Pens Locker Room

An Unofficial List Of The Top 19 Distractions In The Pens Locker Room

It's the new year and the Pens are out of a playoff spot with dwindling hopes of a three-peat. Our beat writer uncovered 19 of the top possible locker room distractions:


19. Coffee machine replaced with K-cups but only hazelnut is left.

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18. PPG Paints insists on repainting the locker room every week, headaches abound.

17. Sid got Breaking Bad seasons 1 & 2 on DVD over the summer.

16. Fewer French Canadians = less poutine.

15. Puberty has been difficult for Guentzel.

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14. Seasons 3-4 of Breaking Bad

13. Politics?

12. Simon didn't say “score while even strength”.

11. Max Talbot keeps showing up for reasons.

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10. Paul Steigerwald is giving rogue interviews and nobody has the heart to tell him the truth.

9. Sid thought the Breaking Bad finale was “just okay”.

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8. Who is this “Matt Hunwick”?

7. Bitcoin investments.

6. The goalies probably shouldn't have laughed at that gypsy that one time.

5. Coach Sullivan already maxed out on his allotted smiles for 2017.

4. Team Dad Matt Cullen hasn't returned from that trip to “go get cigarettes” yet.

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3. Seasons 1-3 of Better Call Saul.

2. Hagelin’s hair keeps clogging the showers.

1. Something Something Fleury's fault.

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LET'S GO PENS.

Shem The Pen's Albums Of 2017

Shem The Pen's Albums Of 2017

Hey 2018, The Keystone Statement Is Like A 1970's Hobo & This Song Sums It Up

Hey 2018, The Keystone Statement Is Like A 1970's Hobo & This Song Sums It Up