The KeysTone Statement

A sports, humor and entertainment blog right in the heart of Pittsburgh (and Pennsylvania).

Final Week Recap Of The 1990s TV Draft: The Hoff, Clarissa, Daria & More

Final Week Recap Of The 1990s TV Draft: The Hoff, Clarissa, Daria & More

For the full sha-bang of the 1990s TV Draft, listen to Episode 18Episode 19 , Episode 20 & Episode 21, Episode 22Episode 23 , Episode 24 & Episode 25 of The Keystone Cast.

Note: In writing a previous post I inadvertently murdered the Week 4 recap post (I "edited" when I should have "duplicated"), so if you go to try look for it on the site, it no longer exists. It's also like James Van Der Beek never existed. Sad!

Bad audio quality be damned, we finished the more structured, yet still flawed 1990s TV Draft, but guess what? Parker Lewis can't lose and neither can us or you because even the "Mr. Irrelevant" pick didn't leave unscathed with heated controversy. Zack Pontious, that notorious rule breaker and residential wearer of items that shamelessly reveal his body hair, tried to draft both Pete & Pete in one pick. Disgraceful. Well, rules prevail and Pontious had to choose a different pick to cap off what has seemingly been a tight race. So press your hand against your phone or computer screen against mine (Dusty Rhodes "Hard Times" style) and let's take this journey one last time, but as always, the rules (which Pontious or Marcus do not read):

The Keystone Cast: “1990s TV Draft” Rules

Rule #1: 28 character roster must have:

  • 4 Sitcom Male Characters

  • 4 Sitcom Female Characters

  • 4 Drama Characters (Male or Female)

  • 4 Nickelodeon Characters (excluded from all other categories; can be Nicktoons, game show hosts, personalities, show characters)

  • 4 Cartoon Characters (Nicktoons do not count)

  • 4 On-Air Personalities (TV hosts, game show hosts, news anchors, sports announcers, pro wrestlers)

  • 3 SNL or In Living Color Cast Members (must have at least one from each)

  • 1 Utility Player (a character from one of the shows that was already drafted)

Rule #2:  A team can only draft one TV character from one show with the exception of the utility player (ex: if you draft Frasier from Frasier, you can't draft Niles)

Rule #3: Draft in whatever order you want as long as the roster spots are filled

Rule #4: Show must have had the majority of it’s run in those years.

Rule #5: No reality TV stars or hosts of a reality TV show (game shows not included)

Rule #6: Cartoon comedy duos (Nicktoons or other network) count as one pick (ex: Ren & Stimpy or Two Stupid Dogs)

"1990s TV DRAFT" ROUND 23 (EPISODE 25)


Pick #67: Tom Green

The Tom Green Show - T.V. Personality (Zack)


Pick #68: Wolverine

X-Men - Cartoon Character (Marcus)


Pick #69: Martha Stewart

Martha Stewart Living - T.V. Personality (Dominic)

"1990s TV DRAFT" ROUND 24 (EPISODE 25)


Pick #70: Topanga Lawrence

Boy Meets World - Sitcom Female (Dominic)


Pick #71: Clarissa Darling

Clarissa Explains It All - Nickelodeon (Marcus)


Pick #72: Mitch Buchannon

Baywatch - Drama Character (Zack)

"1990s TV DRAFT" ROUND 25 (EPISODE 25)


Pick #73: Bobby Generic

Bobby's World - Cartoon Character (Zack)


Pick #74: Blossom Russo

Blossom- Sitcom Female (Marcus)


Pick #75: Dr. Sam Beckett

Quantum Leap - Drama Character (Dominic)

"1990s TV DRAFT" ROUND 26 (EPISODE 25)


Pick #76: Daria

Daria - Cartoon Character (Dominic)


Pick #77: Kenan

Kenan & Kel -Nickelodeon (Marcus)


Pick #78: Sarah McKenzie

J.A.G. - Drama Character (Zack)

"1990s TV DRAFT" ROUND 26 (EPISODE 25)


Pick #79: Darkwing Duck

Darkwing Duck - Cartoon Character (Zack)


Pick #80: Michaelangelo

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Cartoon Character (Marcus)


Pick #81: Alex Mack

The Secret World Of Alex Mack -Nickelodeon (Dominic)

"1990s TV DRAFT" ROUND 28 (EPISODE 25)


Pick #82: Sally Jesse Raphael

Sally - T.V. Personality (Dominic)


Pick #83: Khadijah James

Living Single - Sitcom Female (Marcus)


Pick #84: Dan Conner

Roseanne - Utility Player (Zack)

Let's get one thing clear. Dan Conner is the farthest thing from "Mr. Irrelevant". And let's also be clear: Marcus and Zack both said Sally Jesse Raphael was considered 90s so by those standards that puts her red spectacle wearing ass back on the table. I take her without shame. Sally got me through a lot of after school, pre-dinner time slumps - a little more classier than that scum bum, Jerry Springer, but not afraid to exploit a poor person from time to time. Trash TV royalty if you ask me.

So let's take a look at the final rosters below: 

1990s TV Draft Rosters - Sheet1 (5)-1.png

Who do you think won? No joke, we're going to have our votes along with an unbiased committee vote on each team, category by category to see who is the true 1990s TV Draft King. Sound off in the comments or shoot us an email at thekeystonestatement@gmail.com.

Subscribe to "The Keystone Cast" on iTunes (and write a friggin' iTunes review, eh?)

Le'Veon Bell Applying To Dairy Queen Before Reporting To Steelers Should Be Concerning

Le'Veon Bell Applying To Dairy Queen Before Reporting To Steelers Should Be Concerning

Shem The Pen's Record Reviews: The Who's "Tommy"

Shem The Pen's Record Reviews: The Who's "Tommy"