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The KeysTone Statement

A sports, humor and entertainment blog right in the heart of Pittsburgh (and Pennsylvania).

About Face: Mick Foley Unleashed The Mandible Claw Last Night With A Bang (Bang!)

About Face: Mick Foley Unleashed The Mandible Claw Last Night With A Bang (Bang!)

The Babyface Perspective: Hell Hath No Fury Like A Foley Scorned

Mick Foley, aka Mankind, aka Cactus Jack, aka Dude Love finally reached his breaking point last night on WWE Monday Night Raw as the show's "General Manager" when that evil, spiteful Jezebel, Stephanie McMahon tried to force his hand into firing someone. Being the super nice guy that he is, "Mrs. Foley's Baby Boy" struggled with this idea for the show's entire three hour run (a very long time to contemplate for any TV personality), and when he couldn't do such a horrid, despicable thing (especially right before WrestleMania 33) he chose to fire that devil woman, Stephanie. That sparked an appearance from her cerebral squeeze, Triple H, who also happens to be one of Mick's most storied adversaries. Let the showdown begin.

 Hell hath no fury like a Foley scorned.

In classic, "evil boss" fashion, Trips started to dress down the "Hardcore Legend", calling him "broken down", a "monkey" (copyright DDP, who called me that on a voicemail once for slacking on DDP Yoga) and threatening the potential WWE futures of his children if he didn't fall in line like any good company stooge.

Well, Mick ain't no stooge, and he definitely ain't no monkey. His hands shook with the fire of a thousand Cactus Jacks as he appeared to be exiting the squared circle, seemingly going along with the McMahon mindset, only to secretly reveal to the dozens (and dozens) of his Detroit fans (right there, in the Joe Louis Arena) that he had Mr. Socko ready at the holster.

Triple H noticed Foley's pause and walked up to him, ready to spit out more demeaning commands, only to (YES) get a mouthful of mandible sock! Hunter flailed to escape the hold, all too familiar it's halting powers as Mick cranked further down on the claw, until Stephaine cheap-shotted Mick right in his "Dude Loves" stopping his rebellious display of testicular fortitude. 

Does this mean the end of Mick Foley as Raw GM, let alone WWE employee? Say it ain't so, Mick. Foley's time as an in-ring competitor may be over, but he sure has a lot to give to the wrestling world. #BangBang

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